Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

This weekend the practice is recognizing the things you are thankful for in life...OH YEAH AND EATING AWESOME FOODS OMG YAY

like so many other holidays its more effective to carry a little of the tradition with you every day and everywhere you go
you'll be amazed how awesome life is when you take the time every day to think about how great even the small things are.

Hope you are all well and having a fabulous day!

I've been feeling a little burnt out since school ended. I was really demanding of myself during the school year and didn't miss a beat going from exams to working full time. I've taken some time off now and only just managed to break out of my rut of not doing anything creative. I owe a lot to this place. Browsing through my inbox gave me so much inspiration and motivation to get cracking on a few ideas I'd been pondering. Submissions soon to follow

Thanks once again you fabulous art community you

So how are you all doing anyway?

Its been a while since I've done one of these and since there are over 250 deviations in my watchbox I have plenty to chose from!





hope you are having a wonderful day

teh end...?

deviantArt is... HelpDesk I'm a Beertographer ABCs of dA Inc. I'm an ACE!

Since becoming involved in school I've only been updating casually here and always with the positive things. School is great, my marks are awesome, I've made lots of new friends but under the surface I've reached a boiling point. When it comes to inner conflict I'm EPICALLY guilty of keeping things bottled up which, aside from being highly stressful and self-destructive behavior, has left me feeling really lonely when I didn't need to be. I want to talk about it now though, for the sake sparing anyone like me from the unnecessary stress, frustration and loneliness I endured for the last fifteen years of my life.

I think we can all agree, regardless of orientation, that high school represents a particularly challenging chunk of our teenage years. I felt entirely adrift there. As my peers paired off and spent countless lunch hours talking about crushes and the hottest kids in school I was made more and more painfully aware that I didn't fit in. I couldn't relate, I didn't feel the same urges or have the same needs. At times it felt as though I was standing perfectly still while the world sped on, thundering by my ears along the way. I assured myself that I just needed to meet the right person and when I did I'd feel all those things I was supposed to. I was dateless until college and I've still never had sex. (I'm 27 by the way)

In my first year of college (nine years ago) I met a guy and we started dating. I was fond of him but while we were together I felt as though I was simply going through the motions of dating. I didn't hold his hand because I wanted to, I did because that was what other couples did. I felt like I was pretending to be something I was not and didn't want to drag anyone else into that lie. This was entirely to blame for our amicable split; the relationship lasted three months and remains my longest and only to date. I began questioning many things at this point including my sexual orientation but since I couldn't figure it out I decided to ignore my feelings (or lack there of) in favour of the 'wait and see' approach. (which caused more damage than good in my case)

Some time later I was introduced, through chance meeting, to a girl with whom I became nearly instant best friends. Eventually she asked me out and I felt that horrible lie creeping up on me once again. I was very confused and conflicted by my feelings. I cared a great deal for her but felt no sexual attraction whatsoever, I had no desire to move our relationship beyond the wonderful friendship that it had become. I could not articulate my feelings nor make sense of them and as a result I grew incredibly frustrated.

Returning to the college environment only worsened my frustrations and I felt a tremendous amount of pressure to identify, to chose a side while neither felt right. I wasn't straight nor gay and couldn't settle for being bisexual either. To vent my anxieties I withdrew into my studies. Since I'm rather studious to begin with I didn't realize what I was doing until one of my professors and several of my classmates confronted me (separately and privately of course) out of concern for my well being. I had been building walls and keeping everyone at a good safe distance while I struggled and searched...the years of effort put toward all these things were finally wearing me out.

Out of desperation I started searching for reasons, causes, prescription drug side effects, chemical imbalances...for anything that might explain why I'm the way I am but found nothing. While reading some research on brain chemistry I stumbled across the word 'asexual' and lived one of those perfect moments where in, before cross-referencing the term, I fondly recalled studying amoebas in grade school and felt oddly at ease. Within minutes I'd discovered a community of -thousands- who feel the same way I do.

My entire life has changed, I feel light as a feather and I can't stop smiling. It feels so good to fit in and to know I'm not alone Every stress and frustration and insecurity I've been carrying around has been lifted from my shoulders and I feel absolutely euphoric. I only wish I could have found this out sooner.

This orientation is not fully researched yet but studies are in progress. It is met with a lack of understanding and much controversy. I'm hoping to help change that. If you have ANY questions feel free to ask me.

What is Asexuality: [link]
Asexual FAQ: [link]
Support for Friends/Family: [link]
Asexual Visibility and Eduction Network: [link]

Thank you for listening

teh end...?

deviantArt is... HelpDesk I'm a Beertographer ABCs of dA Inc.

Hurray for time off and an excuse to update here! I has been tagged by the wonderful miss manduh

RULES
- You must fill out EVERY question! No skipping!
- Tag three people afterward.
- Leave a message on their page telling them their tagged.

ARE YOU?
1. Perfect?
Practically perfect in every way! (which is the technical term for HELLZ NO)

2. Tall?
Yep

3. In your pajamas?
and proud

4. Left handed?
ambidextrous

LAST:
1. Friend you saw:
my mom

2. Talked to on the phone:
Sid- the guy who fixes my car

3. Person to text you:
Errrr....Steph maybe? I don't text very often

4. Was today better than yesterday?
Today is still very young but I have a feeling its going to be a good one!

FAVORITES:
1. Number:
Threee

2. Color(s):
Black, red, greenish blue, brown, tan

3. Fruit:
DRAGON! or bananas...I love fruit

4. Place:
my basement studio

EIGHT EMOTIONS:
1. Are you missing someone right now?
Not really

2. Are you happy?
Indescribably

3. Are you sad?
nope

4. Are you bored?
nope!

6. Are you nervous?
*sighs contently in response* nooope

8. Are you tired?
Perhaps a little sleepy as I just woke up

ABOUT YOU:
1. Real name?
Aim!

2. Nick names?
Aims, Aimeroo, incrowd, crowd, target

3. Eye color?
Brown.

4. Zodiac sign?
Aquarius

5. Male or female?
Female

6. Slut?
nope

7. Smart?
Yes!

8. Hair color?
Black

9. Long or short?
short

10. Sweats or Jeans?
Jeans.

11. Phone or Camera?
Camera.

12. Drink or Smoke?
rarely and no

14. Righty or lefty?
bothy!

FIRSTS:
1. First best friend?
I can't recall

2. first crush?
Pete

3. First pet?
Kate the kitty

4. First big vacation?
Ireland

CURRENTLY:
1. Eating?
no

2. Drinking?
coffee

3. I'm about to:
Do some school work then play outside

4. Listening to?
water running

5. Plans for today?
Sneak attack some homework then enjoy the warmish weather

WHICH IS BETTER WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX?

1. Shorter or taller?
doesn't matter

2. Romantic or spontaneous?
spontaneous

3. Sensitive or loud
both

4. Hook-up or relationship?
neither

HAVE YOU EVER:

1. Drank bubbles?
Oh god yes, it was horrible...then I coughed and they came out my noooose

2. Lost glasses/contacts?
I lose my shades constantly!

3. Ran away from home?
Does the end of the driveway count?

4. Broken someone's heart?
Yes

5. Been arrested?
never!! AND THEY'LL NEVER CATCH ME!!!

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

1. Miracles?
whole heartedly

2. Yourself?
Some days

3. Heaven?
Yes

4. Santa Claus?
no

4. Love?
yep

5. Do you like someone?
I like many people

6. Do you believe in God?
Yes

7. Answered the truth on all questions?
Yes!


Q: What was the first thing you did this morning when you got up?
A: played with my kitty

Q: Do you have anything bothering you?
A: no

Q: What's the last movie you saw?
A: Pink Panther 2

Q: Where is the last place you went?
A: the kitchen?

Q. Do you smile a lot?
A: I'm starting too

Q: Do you wish upon stars?
A: for kicks

Q: Are you a friendly person?
A: usually

Q: Where did you sleep last night?
A: my bed! (it was wonderful)

Q: When was the last time you cried?
A: Monday (it was happy cry)

Q: What was your last thought before going to sleep last night?
A: sea otters

Q: Rate life as of right now one being bad ten being great?
A: 11

Q: What do you hear right now?
A: mom brushing her teeth

Q: Does anything hurt right now?
A: my eyes! they don't want to be open yet lol

Q: What's your favorite month?
A: September

Q: What did you do last night?
A: homework!

I am leaving this open for a free tag! Anyone who wishes to may post this in their journal and have some fun answering questions!

teh end...?

deviantArt is... HelpDesk I'm a Beertographer ABCs of dA Inc.